“I don't know whether to sit home and feel sorry for myself,
or shop to blot out my depression”
Melinda and Melinda, Woody Allen
What causes shopping addiction?
According to Shopaholics Anonymous, the causes of compulsive shopping are:• Emotional deprivation in childhood
• Inability to tolerate negative feelings
• Need to fill an inner void
• Thrill seeking
• Approval seeking
• Perfectionism
• Genuinely impulsive and compulsive
• Need to gain control.
Most causes for compulsive shopping would appear to be psychological. Generally a person will be having emotions of loneliness, depression, feeling out of control in a particular area, and will seek to spend money in order to relieve the stress. Spending addiction is a symptom that there are deep-rooted feelings one is trying to avoid facing. An addict indulges themselves in shopping to help numb those troubling feelings – for a while.
But compulsive shopping ultimately satisfies none of those emotional needs the shopper is attempting to fill and the behaviour can escalate. Similar to other compulsive behaviours, sufferers often experience the highs and lows associated with addiction. Like people who feel compelled to shoplift, compulsive shoppers are caught in a cycle of anxiety: endorphin-fuelled highs and guilt-ridden lows. Victims often experience moods of satisfaction when they are in the process of purchasing, which gives the shopaholic a sort of euphoria, excitement, and high that seems to give their life meaning while at the same time letting them forget about their sorrows. But there is usually a feeling of disappointment afterwards – followed by guilt. Once leaving the environment where the purchasing has taken place, the feeling of personal reward may already have gone, so that to compensate, the addicted person goes shopping again in a vicious cycle of repetitive impulse buying – just one more thing to achieve a better self-identity. In this way, shopping addiction acts as a form of self-medication.
Social conditions
Social conditions may also play an important role. Given that consumer culture has an increasing impact on our psychological well-being and our sense of identity, compulsive buying has to be considered as a significant modern addiction – one which has increased rapidly since the 1980s. This is particularly true in Western societies which are so dependent on consumption, and where we are constantly subjected to advertising and marketing campaigns, on our televisions and in magazines. As the writer Gloria Steinhem pointed out: “Most women's magazines simply try to mould women into bigger and better consumers.”
Relational Effects of Compulsive Shopping
Compulsive shopping or spending may result in interpersonal, occupational, family and financial problems in one’s life. In many ways the consequences of this behavior are similar to that of any other addiction.
Impairment in relationships may occur as a result of excessive spending and efforts to cover up debt or purchases. Persons who engage in compulsive shopping or spending may become pre-occupied with that behavior and spend less and less time with important people in their lives. They may experience anxiety or depression as a result of the spending or shopping which may interfere with work or study performance. It is also common for an addict to begin lying and hiding their purchases from their family and keeping their charges to themselves.
Emotional Effects of Compulsive Shopping
The shopping and spending activity itself is associated with a feeling of happiness and power which is immediately gratifying. The after effects of remorse and guilt drive the spender back to purchase again to be able to achieve that brief but intense emotional high. Research has shown that many compulsive shoppers and spenders also suffer from mood disorders, substance abuse or eating disorders. As with any addiction, the person becomes dependent on the behavior to relieve negative feelings that cause them distress and discomfort.
Financial Effects of Compulsive Shopping
Financial problems may occur if money is borrowed or there is excessive use of credit to make purchases. Often the extent of the financial damage is discovered only after the shopper or spender has accumulated a large debt that necessitates a drastic change in lifestyle to resolve. Recovery groups such as Debtors Anonymous have formed to help compulsive shoppers and spenders return to normal, appropriate patterns of buying.How do you control and treat this condition?
It is recommended that spending addicts seek professional counseling or a self-help group to deal with this problem. Addictive behaviours tend to come in clusters, so if you have an eating disorder, a problem with drugs or alcohol, or gambling, you may be a candidate for shopping addiction. Many communities have credit counselling centers that will also help with shopaholism.
There are no standard treatments for shopping addiction. Medications have been used, generally antidepressants that treat, in some cases, the underlying issue of depression in someone with an addiction, but with mixed results. Anti-anxiety medication can also help, depending on the individual. Therapists tend to focus on cognitive-behavioral treatment programs, and credit or debt counselling can be very helpful.
There is no quick and easy answer that will immediately cure a shopping addiction, and while treatment is a necessary part of solving the problem, so is behaviour change on the part of the addict.
Some people may need a self-imposed ban on shopping, whereas a more severe case might need to hand their finances over to someone else entirely.
How do I prevent shopping binges?
The following advice has been offered by bodies such as Shopaholics Anonymous and Debtors Anonymous:
• Admit that you are a compulsive spender, which is half the battle.
• Make a shopping list and only buy what is on the list.
• Destroy all credit cards and cheque books except one to be used for emergency only.
• Avoid discount warehouses or sale shopping. Allocate only a certain amount of cash to be spent if you do visit one.
• ‘Window shop’ only after shops have closed. If you do look during the day, leave your purse at home.
• Do not watch TV shopping channels or catalogue shop and avoid online shopping – particularly late at night or after drinking.
• Do not shop by yourself – most compulsive shoppers shop alone and if you are with someone else you are much less likely to spend ridiculous amounts.
• Take a walk or exercise when the urge to shop comes on.
• Find other meaningful ways to spend your time.
• If you feel out of control, you probably are. Seek counseling or a support group such as Shopaholics Anonymous.
And keep in mind that while behavior change is clearly crucial to recovery, so is reaching out for help in the first place.
